Life as it is... living in Japan

I couldn’t possibly eat another bite… ok maybe just one more… and maybe another fried octopus ball… and some green tea ice cream… and another glass of iced tea. Oh, and I haven’t had that yet, whatever that is. What was that? Intestines. Right. I should probably start asking before I eat things. Although, since I would have to try it either way to avoid hurting any ones feelings, perhaps I will not ask.   Please, I’m asking you, no begging you. I can’t eat anymore. Stop offering it to me. I have already eaten three times the amount that a normal human could eat. I realize that you have to do this, I am your guest after all. But, if you can find it in your heart to just let it go I will love you for the rest of my life. For the rest of my life, definitely, this is all I want to eat. Every day, every week, every month, every year, every decade, every century, until I die, this will be on my plate. I love it! I hate this. It’s only been seven months, and I have a permanent food ba...

This will have to become a regular post I think. Every week a teacher is thinking up a new composition topic which will inevitably lead me to a moment of hilarity. Every second a student is thinking up something absurd to convey to me in English, and just maybe they will actually say it. I would like to share a few of those moments with you now. 3rd Grade Boys Boy 1: Are you a takoyaki? (fried octopus ball) Boy 2: No. Why? Boy 1: Because you look delicious. Boy 1: (running past) cnawoif nsdco wiofh ubrgoasnfvofew fiosncoiwnf Me: (Look at boy 2) Boy 2: I can't understand him. 2nd Grade Composition - What do you want to be in the future? Boy 1: I want to be superman. Because, he has the power of fury. 1st Grade Row Game Losers Challenge Boy 1: Do you love Tommy? (another boy in the class, obviously not named Tommy in real life) Teacher:  Wait. Jaclyn doesn't know Tommy. Tommy stand up and introduce yourself. Tommy: My name is Tommy. Do you love me? Entire ...

Happy Valentines Day everyone! I'm sorry I didn't get you anything. Maybe next year. Probably not.  BEFORE I found myself in a discussion with another English teacher about being single on valentines day a week or so before the actual day. I wasn't complaining, as I have never had the pleasure of being in a relationship on valentines day, and innocence is bliss. I was merely stating an obvious fact. That those of us who are single on valentines day, if a bunch of flowers walks into our line of view, we just can't help but jump to the conclusion that our secret admirer has finally come to his senses and is confessing his love in the most elaborate and amazing fashion. However, it occurred to me, that living in Japan, all hope of my knight in shining armor fantasy is instantly crushed by the fact that women give chocolate to men on valentines day, and not the other way around. No surprise flowers coming my way. Bummer! AFTER Sitting in my apartment enjoying the most del...

I was lied to, on more than one occasion, and it hurts. I tried my best but failed, on more than one occasion, and it's painful.  I was wrong, on more than one occasion, and it's tiring. I'm tired. I am referring to of course my dream to speak Japanese. I have been studying Japanese since I was in 6th grade. I thought I was pretty good back then, until I got to high school and shit got real. Five years of studying at high school, damn I must be so pro. University Japanese, ha ha ha ha ha no. Three years of studying at university, surely now I can speak Japanese. Move to Japan, I have wasted my life! Six months living in Japan. I am currently sitting in the staffroom, starring at another Japanese textbook, thinking to myself:- SOMEONE LIED - Living in Japan does not make learning Japanese quick and easy I TRIED MY BEST - I have studied almost every day since arriving here, and I am still lost I WAS WRONG - my expectations, my views on language learning, and my opinio...